Friday, June 5, 2009

How to Be Popular and Better Off

One big thing I have learned in working with my business coach, is doing the "right" things for the "wrong" reasons erodes your self-confidence.

Losing the faith you had in your own abilities when you were 6 has serious and negative consequences. On the other hand, any increase in your confidence is money in the bank.

Confident people actually do earn significantly more money. They are also more powerful and persuasive with other people. They live better because they perceive the world differently.

More confident people usually:

Perceive other people in a better light.

Assume that other people will like and accept them.

Perform better under pressure.

Do better work when the standards are high.

Have an easier time of not taking criticism personally.

Do not think that others are out to get them.

Make friends easily.

Increasing confidence in your own abilities to solve your problems has a huge multiplier effect in all areas of your life. In my research into why people support charismatic leaders like Hugo Chavez, one of the strongest reasons is that his fans don't think they can make it without the help of a "messiah" leader.

The $25 PhD word for confidence is self-efficacy, fyi.

As I repeatedly tell my clients, confidence is not a speaking technique; it is a way of living.

It is not about imitating another person.

Confidence is feeling the safety to tap into your authentic self (who you really are) instead of trying to be the person others expect, or want, you to be.